Daddy I Lost You
By Jennifer McCormick
(Contact: Jenyrm1@cs.com)
Dedicated to Danny Howard McCormick, my father.
Though he wasn't my real father,
he was the only one I ever knew.
I love him and miss him everyday.
Still I cry.
Daddy I lost you.
Day by day goes by,
And still all I do
Is sit and cry.
For years you've
Been sick and
Somehow managed
To be strong
Through it.
Was it that you
Were trying to be
Strong for me?
Or were you trying
To stay strong
For the family?
Through many years
I saw you suffer, Daddy,
And there was
Nothing I could do.
Oh, how I wished
I could have taken all
Your pain away from you.
When you were in
The hospital and I saw
You hooked up
To so many machines
And I could see
You were hurting,
And your pain
And suffering
Was hurting me.
I loved you so, Daddy.
I was your little girl.
I was your baby.
You have no idea
How happy the
News made me
When the doctors
Said you
Were coming home.
Little did I realize
That soon I'd
Be left alone.
You left me alone here
To take care of Momma,
But it's not the same
Without you here.
I need you back Papa,
So we can go back
To being a family.
Just us three.
You, her, and me.
Back to the way
Things used to be
Before you turned ill.
After you died
My world seemed
To stand still.
I still remember
The day that we
Found you lying
At home dead.
At that moment
So many thoughts
Filled my head.
I can still remember
The panic
In Momma's voice,
But it wasn't by choice.
She walked in
To wake you but
Received no answer,
For your soul
Was not there.
Did you know
How much we cared?
Mom called the paramedics,
And in no time flat
They were knocking
At our door.
They rushed in,
One by one,
But there was
Nothing they could do
But stare at your cold,
Limp body
Laying on the floor.
Oh, how I wished I could
Have told you I love you.
How I wished that
I had known
That that night would
Have been your last,
But I can't go on living
In the past.
The memory is too painful
To push away.
The day you died
Seemed to be just another
Winter's day.
Snowflakes falling
To the ground.
There's nothing I
Wouldn't give to
Hear the sound
Of your laughter,
But there's just no way.
That winter day I was
Sent to stay with Brenda,
You know the one
Who used to live down
The street,
While mom and the
Grownups took care
Of everything.
I felt so useless.
I was in a state of
Denial and shock.
I told myself this
Was all a bad
Nightmare, and that
I'll soon wake up,
When in true life
It was reality.
That day I couldn't do
Anything at all.
I couldn't
Even bring myself to smile.
My stomach churned,
And it hurt too much
To eat.
I'll tell you this
February is not a month
I'll soon forget,
For it took
Away such a special
Part of my life
And left my heart in debt,
In a debt of love.
This month
Took away my
Father and a
Friend so true.
This month I
Lost so much.
I lost you.
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